I'm a proud mama of two intact boys

There. I said it. And maybe when they're older, they'll be mortified to find this blog post and realize I was talking about their penises on the internet. But I hope that they'll be grateful that I let them keep their whole bodies. Heck, I don't even like to say that I "let" them. John and I didn't feel it was our decision to make. And I hope they'll understand that I talk about it here in the hopes that I can convince even one parent out there to leave their precious babies whole and intact in the way that was intended by God or nature or whatever higher power in which that parent believes.

Not a day goes by that I'm not grateful for my boys' whole and beautiful little bodies. Their fingers and toes. Their eyelids and chins. Mikey's cute little dimples. Joey's sweet little spaced out teeth. And yes; their penises have foreskin. It's marvelous to watch them grow and change and learn how to move and function within their whole skin. It's miraculous that out of four microscopic cells grew two perfect and complete human beings. It's awe-inspiring that I housed them in my body for over forty wonderful weeks each and that I was able to provide everything they needed to become people! They were absolutely perfect at birth. They required no alteration.

It took less than five minutes of conversation while I was pregnant with Mikey for John and I to realize that there was no way we would allow any part of our precious son to be removed at birth. And the more I've read and researched in the years since, the more confident in that decision I've become and the more passionate I've become in my belief that every child has the right to retain the entirety of the genitals he or she was born with. The prepuce (or foreskin) is a valuable and integral part of a normal, whole functioning penis. From birth through adolescence and sometimes into young adulthood, it adheres tightly to the shaft of the penis (much as a fingernail adheres to the finger) to protect the glans and urethra from infection. In an adult, the foreskin provides lubrication and millions of nerve endings to aid in sexual performance and pleasure. It is not a birth defect. It is no more dirty, disease-prone, or extraneous than any other part a child is born with. It is analagous to the clitoral hood in females (and in fact, in the early weeks of gestation these parts are identical in the fetus). I think most of us in the U.S. are horrified when we hear tales of female genital cutting. But we're conditioned in this society to believe it is perfectly normal to do this to baby boys. We need to think about this issue critically, and without the filter of generations of propaganda that seek to justify this unnecessary and painful procedure.

There are many reasons to leave a baby boy intact, but for us the most important one -- the one that encompasses all the rest of them -- is simply this: it is not our body. We have no ethical right to make this decision on behalf of our sons.

We have never had any trouble with our boys' penises. We clean the outside like we do any other body part (note: you need never retract someone else's penis!!). It's far easier than the wound care I've seen my friends with circumcised newborns need to perform. I can't imagine how stressful that is on top of all the other adjustment that takes place during those early weeks.

Now, many of my friends -- many of whom may be reading this blog post -- have opted to have their sons circumcised. I know you made the decision you thought was best for your sons. I know that you are kind, loving, wonderful parents who always seek to make the best decisions possible for your children. I don't hate you. I don't blame you for circumcising your sons. But I do hope that if you plan to have more children, you will think critically about this procedure and realize that there is no need to repeat it on subsequent sons. I do hope if a friend comes to you asking for advice, you will respond objectively and not defensively recommend circumcision just because that is the choice that you made. And I hope you can appreciate and respect that this is an issue that I feel very strongly about, and still remain my friend even though you chose differently.

Thoughtful, respectful comments on this post are welcome. Abusive comments will not be published. Thank you in advance for keeping this conversation civil and supportive.